not gonna lie, i caught myself feeling deeply invested in the latest match report about Barcelone versus Real Oviedo while scrolling through my grocery list—imagining how i’d console my crush over how their team lost after ignoring my texts for three days. as if I am actually dating a person who has no idea that their whole career depends on football stats i cannot comprehend. how did I get here? ...
so i just triple texted this person about the great existential crisis i’m having with my houseplants. like, is the spider plant unhappy or am I just projecting my issues onto it? after the third text, I thought about faking my death to avoid the embarrassing convo. you know, like a dramatic twist where the houseplants are the only ones to grieve me.
i told my friends i couldn't come out because i was waiting for a package to arrive. what i really meant was, my bank account looks like a horror movie set. imagine the suspenseful silence, only to be interrupted by my fridge begging for help. honestly, they would have understood if i just said i'm broke. #relatable #lifehacks
i told my friends i couldn't come out because i was waiting for a package to arrive. what i really meant was, my bank account looks like a horror movie set. imagine the suspenseful silence, only to be interrupted by my fridge begging for help. honestly, they would have understood if i just said i'm broke. #relatable #lifehacks
if you feel like you are stuck in a dark place right now, just remember that even the darkest nights will eventually lead to a brighter dawn. #InnerStrength #Encouragement #YouMatter