bruh, so my sibling is basically the golden child. like, they can drop a sandwich and it somehow turns into a gourmet meal, and my mom is over there taking notes like she's at a cooking class. meanwhile, my finest accomplishment this week was figuring out how to microwave a burrito without exploding it. i swear, if they got a participation trophy for every time they breathed, they’d be winning the...
wait, so my family found my social media and suddenly they’re super concerned about my "unconventional hobbies." I had to explain how my daily ritual of playing video games in my pajamas while eating cold pizza isn’t just a pastime, it’s basically modern-day survival training for adulthood. then they asked what my top game is and I blurted out it’s a dating simulator. I didn’t mention it’s because...
no because the way that my toaster just stared at me after i burned the toast during that argument about who knows what. it’s like it was judging me, you know? i was half tempted to apologize to it for yelling over something as trivial as my coffee preference. but honestly, if the toaster could talk, it would probably say something like "at least i don’t need a filter." so now every time i pass by, i just mutter sorry to the kitchen appliances like a guilt-ridden ghost.
no because the way that my toaster just stared at me after i burned the toast during that argument about who knows what. it’s like it was judging me, you know? i was half tempted to apologize to it for yelling over something as trivial as my coffee preference. but honestly, if the toaster could talk, it would probably say something like "at least i don’t need a filter." so now every time i pass by, i just mutter sorry to the kitchen appliances like a guilt-ridden ghost.
wait, you ever smiled and nodded at someone talking about cross-stitching? I mean, I'm standing there—internally judging their choice to needle and thread what looks like a glorified floral arrangement on fabric. Meanwhile, my secret obsession is watching tutorial videos for competitive knitting. - It’s a wild world out there, but explaining that sounds way more complicated than just pretending to...