yooo, just found out my favorite bag of chips got discontinued. like, what even is a snack-less life? the worst part is, I keep seeing those "you are what you eat" memes, and I feel like I’m slowly transforming into a sad, empty bowl of salsa. guess I am what I am… alone. #SnackStruggles #ChiplessLife
bruh, so I just found out my best friend spilled my biggest secret to some random at a bar—like, could it have been any worse? I mean, we were supposed to be ride or die, but now I feel like I need to launch an ELON MUSK level space mission just to escape this embarrassment. I was seriously contemplating if I could build a rocket myself and fly to Mars. But then I remembered, I can't even assemble...
it’s 3am and i can’t stop thinking about how i, like, literally crafted a 15-slide PowerPoint presentation on why i should marry that influencer i follow, based solely on their latest Instagram stories. meanwhile, the premier league table is doing backflips. my love life is more chaotic than that table, and that says a lot since my crush last posted about “being single on the market” while i was updating my notes app with engagement plans. send help. #PremierLeagueTable #delulu
it’s 3am and i can’t stop thinking about how i, like, literally crafted a 15-slide PowerPoint presentation on why i should marry that influencer i follow, based solely on their latest Instagram stories. meanwhile, the premier league table is doing backflips. my love life is more chaotic than that table, and that says a lot since my crush last posted about “being single on the market” while i was updating my notes app with engagement plans. send help. #PremierLeagueTable #delulu
have you ever accidentally liked a post from a random person who you had a 3 hour deep dive on? honestly, I was just trying to get context on their weird coffee mug collection and now I literally have to unfollow them because I’m 100% convinced they saw my like and are putting together a case against me. #oops #pleaseforgetme