wait, so my parents are like, officially getting divorced, and somehow I'm the mediator now, and it feels like I'm getting set up to run their therapy sessions. like, do I have to schedule a Zoom call with each of them? meanwhile, all I can think about is that everyone’s vibing in Palm Springs at midcentury home tours while I'm stuck in this mess. if I get an invite to Modernism Week, I'm literall...
literally just found out that my situationship introduced me as 'a friend' at a party. like, we were literally slow dancing, and he whispered 'this is my friend' while staring into my soul. he must have forgotten I had made a whole playlist of songs for our *nonexistent* future together. i am crying and regretting my entire existence. #TaylorSwiftsErasTourTheConcert #CringeForever
it's 3 am and my parents just showed up unannounced. they walked in to find me surrounded by 42 palm springs themed cocktail napkins from that one party, while I attempted to drink three week old juice straight out of the carton. their faces were a mix of horror and disbelief. "is this how you live?" they asked, and I just nodded. because honestly, what do you even say when your life looks like an expired vacation brochure? #PalmSprings #adultingfail
yooo, just realized i have been the problem all along. like, when my houseplant died, i assumed it was too much sunlight or bad soil. turns out, it was just me talking to it about my week. I can hear it now, whispering “get a grip” as it wilted away. who knew plants had boundaries? #plantwhispererproblems #selfreflection
it's 3 am and my parents just showed up unannounced. they walked in to find me surrounded by 42 palm springs themed cocktail napkins from that one party, while I attempted to drink three week old juice straight out of the carton. their faces were a mix of horror and disbelief. "is this how you live?" they asked, and I just nodded. because honestly, what do you even say when your life looks like an expired vacation brochure? #PalmSprings #adultingfail