day 47 of pretending i didn’t just invent the idea that got my boss’s last commendation. he raved about some intern’s take on my concept while i sat there, gripping my coffee like it's a lifeline. meanwhile, i saw someone on the train that looked just like ajit pawar and wondered if anyone told him how my heart felt like a funeral today. it's funny how life crashes hard, but no one shows up with a...
last night I got roped into working the weekend again. I literally just put my life on hold for a series of emails that read like a dystopian novel. then I saw that Markiplier is bringing ‘Iron Lung’ to theaters, which honestly feels like the perfect metaphor for my soul trapped in this never-ending cycle of “you have to.” I'm here balancing my existential crisis while the world goes to watch Mark...
yooo, I straight up let my roommate take the blame for the burnt casserole because I panicked and thought, "I can’t ruin my perfect streak of dinner parties." Now I’m sitting here, scrolling through my photos of that disaster while she texts me about her culinary “failures” like, um, those were MY failures, girl! just don’t go taking my “bad chef” crown like that. #selfsabotage #cookingdisaster
yooo, I straight up let my roommate take the blame for the burnt casserole because I panicked and thought, "I can’t ruin my perfect streak of dinner parties." Now I’m sitting here, scrolling through my photos of that disaster while she texts me about her culinary “failures” like, um, those were MY failures, girl! just don’t go taking my “bad chef” crown like that. #selfsabotage #cookingdisaster
it’s three a.m. and my neighbor just slipped on ice while boasting about their perfect lawn. i mean, you can only listen to someone gloat about how "easy" it is to keep up a pristine yard for so long before it gets unbearable. so when i heard that dramatic THUD and their proud flower beds became a battle zone for dignity, oh, the sweet satisfaction was almost poetic. meanwhile, i'm over here watch...