wait, just unsent a text about Will Levis and now my crush thinks i sent them an emotional breakup message. they probably think i'm spiraling over our nonexistent relationship. little do they know, i was actually spiraling about his ex posting bikini pics while i’m here asking my plants for advice on adulting. why did i have to get so dramatic over a football player? i can feel the judgment from t...
i just remembered the time i literally tried to reenact a gta 5 heist in my living room using pillows as my crew. when my mom walked in, i confidently explained we were just "getting ready for our big break" while wearing a ski mask i found in the closet. fast forward ten years later, i can’t even break into the snack cabinet without guilt. #Gta5 #NotGonnaLie
So I found out my great aunt used to be a professional banana peeler for a circus and suddenly, my fear of bananas makes a lot of sense. Like, do they even have a peeling championship? Why was that my family’s first fun fact on family game night? And now I can’t look at a banana without feeling like I might start juggling or something. Is that a talent? Do I inherit the ability, or just the neuroses?
So I found out my great aunt used to be a professional banana peeler for a circus and suddenly, my fear of bananas makes a lot of sense. Like, do they even have a peeling championship? Why was that my family’s first fun fact on family game night? And now I can’t look at a banana without feeling like I might start juggling or something. Is that a talent? Do I inherit the ability, or just the neuroses?
you ever watch your boss take credit for YOUR brilliant idea like it’s some cool game announcement? felt like that time they added trophies to PS5 classics. I put my heart and soul into that suggestion. they praised the "team effort," but I was the only one practicing my acceptance speech in the bathroom. I might as well have gifted them the trophy myself. now I am thinking about joining a cult or...