if you are in a tough spot right now, just remember that every experience, even the painful ones, are part of your journey towards something greater. #InnerStrength #Healing
it's not that I don't value our friendship, it's just that the only time my 'best friend' texts is when their dog is stuck in a bush...again. like, does my emotional support actually depend on your pet's shenanigans? but hey, who needs deep conversations when you can send memes about it, right? #friendshipgoals #whoneedsboundaries
wait, so my parents were my age when they planted an entire garden with vegetables and everything—like, are you kidding me? meanwhile, i can barely keep a cactus alive and the only thing i’ve cultivated is a weird fascination with celebrities who do yoga. like, how did they have time for homegrown tomatoes while i’m busy trying to remember if i even have a houseplant or if it’s just dust at this point. it feels like i’m losing the adulting competition to someone who thinks "that'll make a good Instagram post" is the same as gardening wisdom.
wait, so my parents were my age when they planted an entire garden with vegetables and everything—like, are you kidding me? meanwhile, i can barely keep a cactus alive and the only thing i’ve cultivated is a weird fascination with celebrities who do yoga. like, how did they have time for homegrown tomatoes while i’m busy trying to remember if i even have a houseplant or if it’s just dust at this point. it feels like i’m losing the adulting competition to someone who thinks "that'll make a good Instagram post" is the same as gardening wisdom.
just realized my best friend shared my deepest secret with someone. now im convinced they think im the reason interest rates are so high. what if everyone thinks i ruined the economy just because my heart skipped a beat when i found a small crack in my apartment wall? time to change my name, move to a cave, and invest in knitting as my new career. #FedMeetingInterestRates #SecretLifeOfMyWalls