so after staring at the same response for three days, they finally texted 'lol' like it’s a group chat about the weather, meanwhile i'm over here plotting how to get through another work week without engaging in more human contact than my morning coffee.
my cousin just posted about the gas company doing upgrades on our street, and all I could think was wow, at least something’s getting fixed. meanwhile, i’m over here with an entire career built on safe choices, haunted by my past dreams of being a llama wrangler or professional kazoo player... what do you do with a degree that didn't come with any refund options? #AtmosEnergy #Regret
ngl, I've been sitting on this plan for months—literally trying to wait for the "perfect moment" to tell my boss I'm leaving for a long-term gig in St. Barths when I find out she’s already booked a company retreat there for New Year’s and was about to announce my promotion over mimosas—except she accidentally called me by the name of the intern I’m training—who she has since decided is going instead. #StBarths #officebetrayal
ngl, I've been sitting on this plan for months—literally trying to wait for the "perfect moment" to tell my boss I'm leaving for a long-term gig in St. Barths when I find out she’s already booked a company retreat there for New Year’s and was about to announce my promotion over mimosas—except she accidentally called me by the name of the intern I’m training—who she has since decided is going instead. #StBarths #officebetrayal
so i was at this potluck and overheard my friends talking about my “quirky” dance moves. they weren't saying it as a compliment. turns out they think it looks like a cross between an octopus having a seizure and someone trying to shake out a really stubborn fart. i just thought i was vibing, not auditioning for a circus act.