i cannot believe i got into a parasocial beef with a fan account of my *notorious* celebrity crush—like, do we need to have a duel or something? they posted an absurdly edited video with commentary calling them "overrated." how dare they—like you don’t know the HOURS i have spent daydreaming about us sharing snacks at a poetry slam in a cozy cafe? i was ready to comment, then thought better of it ...
bruh, I literally just found out I can’t go to my neighbor's SUPER BOWL party after I spent six months asking if I could bring my fancy napkins and now I'm just… here alone with my dignity, which I lost like four napkin folds ago. honestly, I was ready for a theme song moment. guess I'll just cheer for the chips from my couch. #lostopportunity #napkinfiasco
bruh, I just found out my coworker took credit for my project, the one with the ice cream flavor ideas for the company lunch. I am talking like I literally submitted a twelve-page document about mint chocolate chip and they just added their name at the top. I can't help but imagine them savoring their promotion like a cone melting in summer while I sit here, crying in the break room, planning the sweetest revenge: naming a new flavor after them, called "Bitter Betrayal."
bruh, I just found out my coworker took credit for my project, the one with the ice cream flavor ideas for the company lunch. I am talking like I literally submitted a twelve-page document about mint chocolate chip and they just added their name at the top. I can't help but imagine them savoring their promotion like a cone melting in summer while I sit here, crying in the break room, planning the sweetest revenge: naming a new flavor after them, called "Bitter Betrayal."
i keep going back to that weird fruit stand on the corner. you know the one. where the bananas look like they have secrets and the oranges are definitely judging me. everyone says i should leave, but who else will appreciate the apples’ hidden sass? i just bought a pineapple, so i guess we're committed now.